Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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