idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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