Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
the raccoons are back...
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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