Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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