guys are not supposed to queef...right?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize