Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
