Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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