Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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