she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
