I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
