lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Randomize
