So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
