when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Farmville is her only friend.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
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