He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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