Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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