Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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