Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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