1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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