This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
