I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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