i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
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