I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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