What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
