How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize