Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I look excited, but its just a facade.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
