oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
