Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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