i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize