Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
