How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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