I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I am available for nakedness
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
