I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Randomize
