Well apparently he's into motor boating.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
