Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
