So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize