I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize