I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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