her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
