Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
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