I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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