nut hugger
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Randomize
