Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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