I will die if light touches me.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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