Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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