it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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