Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize