The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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