Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
