Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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