I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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